Thursday, April 8, 2010

As a doula, I know better.

Look. I'm human.

I know I should know better, but hey.. it happens to us all.

Just remember what its like when you are 35 weeks pregnant, tired, chasing three other littles and so tired and drained from a sinus cold due to an ungodly amount of pollen in your state.

But often today I found myself saying, "Rachel, you could actually have this baby early."

Now, as a doula I would respond to a client who says that, like this: "Yes you very well could. But remember, each pregnancy is different and each labor is different. Also, with natural childbirth you have to be prepared to labor when your body says it's time, which could be 41-42 weeks."

I want to slap that doula.

Ha! Here's how it worked in my head today. I went back and looked and the evidence with Eva.
-Planned induction on a Tuesday, at 38.1 weeks.
-the week before at 37.1 weeks I was checked and found to be at 5cm's. (no ctx's just braxtons).
-at 37.4 I had my membranes stripped (on the Friday before my induction)
-at 37.5 I lost my mucus plug and started prodromal labor.
-at 37.6 I had 5-6 hours of consistent 8 min apart ctx's.. (prodromal) because they puttered out that evening.
-38.0 weeks.. another day of prodromal.
-38.1 -induced. two hours of labor and had a baby.

Now, I am convinced that had I waited (not been induced) I would have had that baby sometime that week (week 38). However, again.. not a guarantee when it comes to facts. You can loose your mucus plug two weeks ahead of time, even though most moms loose it and have their babies a few days later. And prodromal, that can last weeks too.

However, none of that has any bearing on this pregnancy, yet I still rationalize in my head that it could happen this time. What I really mean is.. I want it to happen this time.

Yeah, I said it. I know my baby needs to cook as long as he needs, but lets just say, I won't be sad if he comes early. ;-)

See, as a doula, I am rolling my eyes at my pregnant self.


Lindsay said...

Ha! Too funny. I remember thinking at the beginning of my pregnancy with Tessa that I didn't want to be induced unless it was an absolute medical emergency (like it was with Eli). Then, at 37 weeks when my blood pressure was high (but had not developed into pre-eclampsia) and Dr. R. said "I think it would be a good idea to move toward delivery sooner rather than later), I jumped on it and justified it as "Dr.'s orders", when really I was just SO READY to have that baby! In hindsight, I probably could have bought myself some more time before induction if I'd fought for it. It's funny how desperate you get in those last weeks. Next time, I'm sure I'll need you to give me many pep talks to get me through to that goal of a completely natural birth (assuming we're okay health-wise).

I hope the next few weeks fly by for you (and that maybe God would wish for this baby to be born just a couple of weeks early :)).

Greta said...

And as a mom who HAS gone to 42 weeks (and then was induced, duh duh duuuuh), I totally get where you're coming from :).

Natalie said...

Oy Rachel. I feel ya.

Sandy said...

I don't blame you for wanting your little man in your arms instead of your belly! Just remember that wishing for him to come early doesn't make you any less prepared to wait if necessary!

Cherylyn said...

This is SO TRUE! I went through the same thing with my last pregnancy a year ago. The logical doula side of me knew that I was being irrational and hormonal, but the irrational and hormonal side of me didn't care that I was being that way. My baby ended up coming 5 days past the due date, later than my other 4. Hang in there sweetie. I know, believe me I know how you feel, and that it feels like forever. Use this time to prepare yourself: body, mind and spirit, and come to terms with yourself and your baby. It will all happen as it needs to happen. Thanks so much for sharing your feelings.

andria said...

You are too funny! I would be laughing aloud right now if it wasn't for three kids and a husband who are sleeping. I have always "had that feeling" that all of mine would come early, and they all have...39.1 weeks, 36.2 weeks, and 38.3 weeks. I am SO glad that they all came early (even though I do know the long they stay in the better), you just get to that point and want out of pregnancy...then you want to be pregnant again, and on and on it goes, I think...LOL! Congrats on the new little guy. -BTW, I made our blof private a while back, so since we don't really know eachother in "real" life I don't have your email to send you and invitation to still view our blog. If you'd like to view it still just leave me a comment sometime with your email.