Birth Story: My sweet Evan "Isaac" Garcia, 05/12/10

So I've written a few birth stories for other moms, but writing my own is always difficult for me. I don't know why. There are so many different ways to process my birth and Im sure that not everyone cares for all the details, but at the end of the day, I write it out for me. For my own personal reading. I just invite the world to read it if they want to.

With that in mind.. Here is my best attempt at the details.

Isaac, my fourth baby, was new territory for me. My first pregnancy/delivery w/o the plan for an induction. As long as my blood sugar levels were in control, no matter how much insulin I was on (which turned out to be about 200 units a day there at the end), and the baby looked great (on the NST) then we would just wait for him to come on his own. **I will have to do a separate post about the process of waiting.**

At 39 weeks I lost my mucus plug. Well it was a gradual process, actually. On my last dr's appt when I was 39. 4 (monday) I was 5 cm's (same thing I did with Eva). I had been 4 cm's for almost 2 weeks. I had been contracting off and on for weeks at this point. Prodromal labor. Stronger than braxton's but not what you could classify as "active labor" contractions. HOWEVER, there was obvious cervical change. These ctx's would come 10 min apart or 20 min apart for a few hours and then stop completely. And then not show up for two more days. On Wednesday the 12th (39.6 weeks), I woke up and felt different. Couldn't say for sure what it was. I just felt, hopeful. Different. ***GROSS ALERT*** I had lost a big part of my plug, when I got up that morning.

So I decided to take the kids to the church drop in nursery service and go get a pedicure.. ya know, to keep my mind off of wondering when labor would start. I got to the church about 8:45 and headed to the nail place. I got there and in a chair about 9:30. As soon as I put my feet in the warm water I noticed the ctx's. They weren't "painful" but definitely noticeable. I could talk thru them, but would probably just be a little uncomfortable. So they kept coming. I'm a doula... so I refused to time them. What I mean is, Im so used too telling people not to time ctx's until they are more intense and notice a strong need to concentrate, that I didn't want to time my own. But for some reason, I kept glancing at my watch. I noticed they were coming every 5 minutes then one at 8, one at 5, one at 8. and so on. then it went to 4 and 7. After an hour of that.. and my toes were freshly painted, I called my friend Natalie (also my photog for the birth). She is preggers with her sixth baby and knows a thing or two about birth.

Let me say here.. the reason i was in denial about whether this could be labor is because up until this point I had never experienced a ctx without a synthetic hormone surging through my body. I've never had a spontaneous labor before. I thought for sure it would have to "hurt" worse for it to be "active." (don't worry.. I wasn't disappointed).

I told Natalie what was going on but that it had only been happening for an hour and a half, yet these were the most consistent and close ctx's I'd had up until that point. She told me about one of her births that followed the same pattern (the woman has had 5 births..so there is bound to be variety she can share from). She encouraged me to go get checked. I kinda felt the same need.

The dilemma then became what to do with my other kids. They were still at the church nursery, which you have to get your kids by 12 p.m. It was 11 a.m. I would only have one hour and I would have to drive to my doc's office (which is the same location as the hospital). I called the nursery director, Alison, and told her what was going on and they were so excited and more than willing too take care of the kids past the time of normal hours. And even go get my kids some lunch. I told them that it was likely nothing and that I may only be about 30 minutes late.

I got to my doc and say "Alright, Ross (that's dr. ross), just be warned: I don't think this is labor. I'm sure you are going to check me and there won't be any change from monday."

He checks and says, "Weeelll, I think 8 cm's is some good change."

WHAT? No stinkin' way. I was in complete shock. he suggested I go ahead and go downstairs to L&D, but not to get too ahead of ourselves because Isaac was still very high (-3 station). yeah.. exactly. That's high. But he, Ross, was convinced that once my water broke, it would go quickly.

So within the hour I was admitted, had my heplock and was getting a strip on the baby. My hubby had arrived, so did Natalie, Christina, Jennifer, Martha (MIL), Darcy (mom), Rachel (little sister) and my sister Mishka and Livia (neice) were on their way from Montgomery. You could say there were quite a few people there.

and that's Courtney, my nurse. She couldn't stay for the whole time.. but I was thankful to have her. She was with me for Eva's birth.

So we began the process of waiting.. My ctx's had gone to about 5 minutes apart and were still not super strong. Everyone kept saying how easy it looked, but I kept reminding them that my water was still intact. Knowing Isaac was still so high, I decided to walk the halls.

and sit on the ball.
But after two hours there was no change. Dr. Ross asked me if I wanted him to break my water and I declined. The dilemma was that I did NOT want any reason for them to have a "timeline" on me and if I didn't have change fast enough, the Pit talks begin. The other issue was that Ross was on call for me even though he wasn't officially on call. He mentioned that he did have an event at church that night but that he thought I'd have the baby before then. But I said I would try to do some nipple stimulation with the breast pump and walk more. The pump helped get the ctx's to about 3 minutes apart. But once I got off the pump, they slowed down again. After another two hours the only cervical change I had was Isaac came down to a -2 station.

At this point, Dr. Ross came back in and said he cancelled his teaching gig at the church and would be "all ours" for as long as it took to have the baby. But he also suggested breaking the BOW. I didn't mind doing that if Dr. Ross promised not to even mention the "P" word (pitocin) and that there would be no timeline/deadline. His exact words were, "Nope. No pit. I got your back. No Pit. Absolutely not." So at that point (4 hours with no huge change) I opted for AROM. I was 8/90/-2. and of course after that happened. The ctx's definitely picked up in intensity.

I got in the shower 30 minutes after my water was ruptured and really enjoyed the distraction of the water. And within another 30 minutes I was 8.5/100/-1 I got back on the birthing ball and another 3o minutes I later I was 9/100/0. Back to the shower I went, but this time the ctx's were so intense that even the shower wasn't "doing it" for me anymore. I got out, went to the bed and had the hardest hour of the entire labor. I was on my hands and knees over the head of the bed and had a fan blowing right on me. The hard part was i would have a short ctx of about 90 seconds and then it was followed a minute later by a 3 minute double-peak ctx.

The double peak contractions were the hardest part. And because I had figured out the pattern of the "two different" ctx's I was having, I would get through the shorter one ok, but then I would beat myself up mentally about the double-peak one coming next. I was so surprised that it hurt just as much as a pitocin ctx. I really thought it would be easier than the pit. But my friends, it turns out that transition is transition, no matter if you have Pit or not. In fact, my second nurse (shift change) Katie (also a friend), had an unmedicated pit birth with one of her babies and said she is convinced that the Pit isn't really so bad in way of "pain" like we make it out to be, but rather, it's transition that is the kicker. And that is difficult either way. I have to agree. Having done it both ways, I feel like I can have that solid opinion. haha.

So after that hour I was 10/100/0 at 7:18 (seven hours after admission to the hospital. 5 hours with no pain/or change. and 2 hours of real work). I normally am not a proponant of pushing at a zero station.. but Isaac was so big that the pressure to push was there immediately and I HAD to PUSH. So that's what I did. I started at 0. And can I say here that the ctx's were painful... but pushing was not. Even when that big boy was crowning.. it was such sweet relief to push. I was, once again, motivated and (oddly) convinced that he really was going to come out! LOL.

Yeah, lets discuss this position (below). I started out in a squat. And after one of the pushes I decided I wanted to recline. Weeell, at that point, there was no convincing me to move back up to that bar. I was staying put. It's funny to look at this picture because it looks like such an awkward position to push in.. but it worked just fine. I was kind of on my left side leaning into Jorge, and sitting up.. yeah.. interesting.

And at 7:40 (22 minutes later) my sweet, big, Evan "Isaac" was born!

this is the moment (below) that I got my first real "look" at him. Katie was picking him up to weigh him and I said, "holy COW, he is huge!!"

Umm.. yeah he is!
All 9 lbs 7 oz of him. What a little butterball. No wonder he took his time engaging.

the best Doc in all of Brookwood saying a prayer for our sweet baby and family! I really do love Dr. Ross. He did something for me that most doc's would never do: be on call for their patient even when they aren't the ones on call. He went above and beyond for us an is so patient and a great advocate for a mom's birth plan. We love you Dr. Ross (not that I think he even reads my blog).

We are so blessed to have our fourth baby and third little man of the family. God has, as always, amazed us and our hearts are full to the brim.

I am so thankful for everyone that was there. I know it was a zoo. But I loved it and I certainly couldn't have done it without you!

WHOA baby!

Heck yeah, I pushed that big boy out!

I promise.. the birth story will come soon. Im a little busy at the moment.. but thought I'd share this precious picture.. captured by Natalie..

It's a BOY!!

Evan "Isaac" Garcia.. 5/12/10.. 7:40 p.m.. 9 lbs 7 oz.. 22 inches long.

Adorably chunky.

Praising the Lord.

Birth story to come. ;-)

Spontaneous Labor, for me, is a trust issue.

You know, come to think of it, I know I'm not the only one that feels this way.

Last night I had a "come to Jesus meeting" with myself. And I had to acknowledge some feelings that are hard to admit.

I've had three "medically necessary" inductions. (at the time, I was told they were medically necessary, but in hindsight had I had more info it could have been avoided). And in this day in time, c-section rates and induction rates are skyrocketing. It is very rare to see a mom enter an L&D ward with spontaneous labor.

In the past 10 months as a doula I have helped 13 moms with their delivery. All but one, were spontaneous labors. All were unmedicated (props to Lindsay for doing a Pit birth unmedicated). And with each mom I got the privilege of encouraging her by saying "yes, your body was created.. to birth your baby. You will go from one day having no labor signs to the next.. the onset of labor. God made your body to not only grow the baby but to deliver it too."

Well yesterday, I realized that while i knew that in my head, i was not trusting it for myself. I thought, "sure, others can start labor.. but me, I've only had a synthetic hormone prompt my labors. So I doubt I will ever start labor on my own." It was a very humbling moment as I realized that I wasn't truly trusting my God in His design. I also wasn't trusting the Lord with "an open hand" for my due date, which is May 13th.

My hubby got a letter in the mail two weeks ago that said he was finally scheduled for his citizenship test and ceremony for May 19th. He has waited 20 years for this day. I have waited with him 7 of those years. And it is a very important deal for us. It is also in Atlanta and it is also not an option to reschedule. Well, unless you'd like to pay the US government another $700. And thinking that if I went to my due date, and then stayed in the hospital 2 days, I did not want to be 6 days post-partum heading to Atlanta for this appointment. It made much more sense (in my head) to try and sweep my membranes before hand and "pull out all the stops" earlier so that we could make this delivery a little earlier. Needless to say, my sweet Heavenly Father showed me that I really wasn't trusting Him for His planning of the birthday as well. He is the one who knows what day this child will be born and He is also the one who knew the date of the citizenship ceremony and i can trust that He will work it all out for my good and His glory.

Now that may sound trite to some.. but for me, it was a major issue. To learn to open my hand in ALL areas of a spontaneous birth.. not just in 'can my body do it'.. but will I let my body do it. It is a GREAT thing I am privileged to walk through and I know that God is growing me through it. It's a wonderful lesson to learn to trust for yourself, the things you have encouraged others in.

And just for the record.. Im starting to lose my mucus plug. ;-P (see, my body IS doing it).

As a doula, I know better.

Look. I'm human.

I know I should know better, but hey.. it happens to us all.

Just remember what its like when you are 35 weeks pregnant, tired, chasing three other littles and so tired and drained from a sinus cold due to an ungodly amount of pollen in your state.

But often today I found myself saying, "Rachel, you could actually have this baby early."

Now, as a doula I would respond to a client who says that, like this: "Yes you very well could. But remember, each pregnancy is different and each labor is different. Also, with natural childbirth you have to be prepared to labor when your body says it's time, which could be 41-42 weeks."

I want to slap that doula.

Ha! Here's how it worked in my head today. I went back and looked and the evidence with Eva.

-Planned induction on a Tuesday, at 38.1 weeks.

-the week before at 37.1 weeks I was checked and found to be at 5cm's. (no ctx's just braxtons).

-at 37.4 I had my membranes stripped (on the Friday before my induction)

-at 37.5 I lost my mucus plug and started prodromal labor.

-at 37.6 I had 5-6 hours of consistent 8 min apart ctx's.. (prodromal) because they puttered out that evening.

-38.0 weeks.. another day of prodromal.

-38.1 -induced. two hours of labor and had a baby.

Now, I am convinced that had I waited (not been induced) I would have had that baby sometime that week (week 38). However, again.. not a guarantee when it comes to facts. You can loose your mucus plug two weeks ahead of time, even though most moms loose it and have their babies a few days later. And prodromal, that can last weeks too.

However, none of that has any bearing on this pregnancy, yet I still rationalize in my head that it could happen this time. What I really mean is.. I want it to happen this time.

Yeah, I said it. I know my baby needs to cook as long as he needs, but lets just say, I won't be sad if he comes early. ;-)

See, as a doula, I am rolling my eyes at my pregnant self.

Labor support

Great post about continuous support during labor.. (with a video)

http://enjoybirth.wordpress.com/2009/11/12/continuous-support-during-birth-is-golden/

Birth Pet Peeve #42

Okay, while I don't have an official "Pet Peeve" list or anything, I'm sure I could come up with at least 42 items of frustration.  

However, I do have one that has been on my mind not only because I have been hearing it "happening" to other mothers I know, but I have also experienced it first hand.  

First, let me ask you a question?  Would you ever assume that your very well educated and experienced OB would be able to tell you when he/she thought you might conceive?  

Have you ever asked your OB when he/she thought you might become great with child?

Have you ever had an OB tell you, without your asking, when they thought you might conceive?  

I'm going to take a big guess that the answer is NO.  Why would you, right?  It's not like they can predict these things.  

HOWEVER.. fast forward to 39 weeks of pregnancy and all the sudden you and said OB are convinced that if they said, "you are going to have this baby by this weekend, I'm sure of it" that now all the sudden they have supernatural powers that have been hidden up until now.  

You might want to ask them to purchase a lottery ticket for you too, while you're at it.  

Okay, I jest.  But here is my frustration: 

NO ONE, except the LORD HIMSELF, knows when that baby is coming.  Can you guess? Sure that's why its called and ESTIMATED due date (EDD).  That is NOT an eviction day: either the baby comes on that day or else.  

Besides the fact that no doctor is that smart to "know" when baby is coming they also do not "know" how long a labor will last.  

With my third child I walked into my OB appointment at 37 weeks, with no contractions and yet, when my beloved doctor checked me I was a whopping 5 cm's.  He was in complete shock.  Of course he started asking me if I had had any contractions of any intensity (as if I could forget what a contraction feels like) and whether I had any bloody show..etc.  I told him.. "nope. I've just been taking my Evening primrose oil everyday."   Well the next thing out of his mouth was, "Well, Rachel, I think you will have this baby by the end of the weekend."  Of course, I laughed thinking "how silly."  

But what happened next was a surprise , even to me.  I got in my car.. called my hubby, my sister and every other friend I have to tell them "guess what?  I'm 5cm's dilated.. and the doc thinks I'll have the baby by Sunday."  NEVERMIND the fact that I knewI had been taking EPO, this was my third child, I had NOT ONE contraction and dilation can happen even before labor officially "begins."  

Nope. None of that mattered.  My doctor is knowledgeable.  He's seen women in labor for years.  He's delivered countless babies.. surely he knows a labor about to begin when he sees it.  

WRONG.  

I stayed 5 cm's for another week.  In fact, at my next appointment (when I hadn't had that baby by SUNDAY), he came in and what did he say?  "I am so shocked to see you here!"  Why?  Because you now realize that with birth nothing is guaranteed and that you can not predict the future?  I then told him how disappointed I was when Monday morning came and I didn't have that baby and I begged him to never, never, never, never, ever, no matter how much you have the urge to "encourage" a mom, please, please, DO NOT tell her something that you can not, in fact, guarantee. I was dead serious and I believe he actually considered my words.  

Here is the point.  You need to consider every single gestation not in terms of 40 weeks but in terms of 42 weeks.  Even ACOG standards consider postdate to be 42+ weeks.  Meaning, even the "holy grail" of medical standards says you don't need to induce until 42+ weeks, unless there is medical indication.  

Point being:  40 weeks is not the eviction day, its the estimated due date. And when you will begin labor is unknown.  The AVERAGE gestation for first time moms is 41.5 weeks.  Average means some go before, and some go after that.  

And whatever you do.. if your doctor tells you that supposed encouraging info "I think it's going to happen this week (or enter day/time here)" remind them (and yourself) that NO MAN knows the future and that we would call that prophecy, and in the days of  Old Testament Law... if your prophecy didn't come true you were killed.  

Not that I'm saying a hormonal, frustrated, very pregnant woman should consider killing.. even if you want to.  

I couldn't agree more..

Response to NBC's "investigation" on Extreme Birth. 

http://enjoybirth.wordpress.com/

Thumbs down to NBC!!!

Birth Story: Mom's version

Greta put up her version of her birth story, check it out here.  

If you haven't already read my perspective (as the doula) of this birth, you can do so here. 

Please watch this.. you will be changed.

It's an hour long.

It's hard to watch at times (only because it takes you out of your own comfortable world)

It's inspiring.

(click here) video documentary

"A Doula Story documents one African American woman’s fierce commitment to empower pregnant teenagers with the skills and knowledge they need to become confident, nurturing mothers. Produced by The Kindling Group, a Chicago-based nonprofit organization, this powerful film follows Loretha Weisinger back to the same disadvantaged Chicago neighborhood where she once struggled as a teen mom. Loretha uses patience, compassion and humor to teach “her girls” about everything from the importance of breastfeeding and reading to their babies, to communicating effectively with health care professionals."

cant.stop.laughing #2

I really enjoy this movie.. really..



"you have to admit..it's a valid suggestion."

yes, that is a tear in my eye.. from laughing..

Child Birth...

well if you count my own births, one of my sisters' three, and two friends' births, then today would total: 8. Eight births that I have been able to be a part of.   but of those births 3 were all natural, and of those three 2 were with pitocin and no epidurals.. but today was different in that I was solo.. in the coaching chair that is. I think the technical term is doula, but since I'm not certified or anything (who knows when I will get to that part... ) the role is still the same:  coach momma through contractions and help parents get the birth they want by dealing with pain management and working with the hospital staff.  

I LOVED it.  First I have to say thank you to Lindsay and JC for allowing me the privilege of being in the room during such a sacred and blessed event.  Wow, I could live off this high for a long time.  Lindsay was induced and stayed on the pit drip up until 7 cm's, which by the way: she went from 1 to 7 in a little over 2 hours.  Then the pit was turned off and shortly thereafter she had her beautiful baby girl.  She did fantastic!  Seriously! 

I know I have sung the praises about natural birth (namely mine), but there is such a different side to be experienced when you are the one coaching someone else, on your own, well not on your own, but without other doulas/coaches there.  I learned a lot today about trusting your gut and what the body is communicating.. Birth is so amazing.  God created our bodies to grow those babies and also to push them out.  And when we allow our bodies to do just that you will be amazed at how you CAN do it.  Your body was made for it.  

You truly can take it "one contraction at a time" until you are pushing that precious little head out and then onto scooping that little baby onto your chest.  Wow.. I am amazed at the gift of God through birth.  Seeing that even in our most painful moment, He is there and is able to give strength to our bodies (and mostly to our mental fortitude) to arrive at the end.  

Anyway.. I just had to share.  I am so thankful to the Lord for what I was able to gain from today.. and I look forward to more opportunities to help momma's get the birth's they want.  

IM CRYING!!

Okay so the clip below has me in tears.. I LOVE it.  When we actually watched it in the movie we had to pause the movie so that I could gain composure bc I was laughing so hard. 

I think what cracks me up the most is her reaction.. I LOVE it! Even though I did two epidurals and one natural birth, I love the response... because it sure is much "easier" with the epi. OH well, I hope you got a good laugh.

Medicated birth vs. Unmedicated birth (my thoughts only)

I know that before I start this post I should give three qualifying statements to open:

1. These are my opinions only. My goal in this post is just to talk through my experience and process it for myself. You are just reading in on my thoughts. I am not trying to persuade anyone.

2. I did not have a "natural" birth in the true sense of the word. I was induced and delivered unmedicated. There is a huge difference and I can elaborate on that later.

3. As I have stated before, I loved my two medicated births (in the sense of being medicated) and had no "issues" with an epidural. But I also chose to do this birth unmedicated.

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With that said I guess the easiest way for me to break down the "pro's and con's" of each is to just do a simple list. And since every woman's body and each woman's pregnancy is so different, none of these pro's and con's can be "the rule."

Medicated: Pro's:

You don't feel much (if your epidural works). Main reason to get it, right? ;-P

You can adjust the amount of medicine released based on what you are comfortable with.

You are able to "relax" or sleep during your labor right up until its time to push.

Medicated Con's:

-If you get too much med's you can't move at all and this doesn't help when it's time to push.

-The epidural is known to slow things down a bit. So your labor can last longer even though you can't feel it.

-If your epidural doesn't work, and you were counting on it working and then you have to go unmedicated, you will not be happy and then have a disdain for unmedicated. But that is only bc you aren't prepared mentally, physically or emotionally to go unmedicated.

-(for me) the recovery time was slower with an epidural. After delivery I was lethargic and took a while before I could "get a grip" and not look like I was drugged.

-the baby can also have a harder time nursing after a medicated birth.

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Before I start the pro's and con's of an unmedicated birth I need to explain the difference between an unmedicated birth and an unmedicated natural birth. Natural means you go on your own. You are waiting for your body to kick into gear when the baby and your body are ready (i.e labor begins). My birth, unmedicated, was not natural in that sense. I was induced (because of a medical reason) and therefore some of the experience on my pro's and con's list I would not have had with a truly natural birth. Pitocin changes everything when it comes to labor.

Unmedicated Pro's:

-I was more involved in my plans for delivery. I was part of the process rather than just being brought in and told what to do. I was being asked what my desires were. That was awesome to know that I was in charge of my delivery.

-Even with pitocin contractions (stronger and less breaks) I enjoyed feeling what was going on with my body and making adjustments according to what felt better.

-I truly bonded with my husband (he was my coach) in a way that I had not bonded with him in our other two births. I needed him more. He was my support. I was depending on him in a way I had never done before. We did it as a team. I also feel this about all those in the room with us (although more so with my husband). I truly feel like I could not have done it without the group effort. We were all apart of the process.

-I recovered quicker while at the hospital. I was able to go to the bathroom an hour after delivery. thats a big deal. I had the ability to move.

-I was exhausted from the delivery but only because of all the work that I did, not because I was lethargic from the drugs.

-I had a huge sense of accomplishment when I saw my body do something that I never thought was capable. There was, is, a huge sense of pride in that. But it came as a surprise bc that isn't what I was looking for.. I wasn't trying to be superwoman. I just wanted to experience it without meds.. but I ended up seeing how awesome it felt to "climb that mountain."

Unmedicated con's:

-(with pitocin) the strength of the contractions continued even after the baby was out. With natural, this would not have been the case. This made me less interested in holding Eva since I still needed to focus through the contractions until the placenta was out.

-(with pitocin) the contractions are stronger with less breaks.. it took me a while to get used to that. But this also meant that labor was very quick. I went from 6 to 10 cm's in an hour and it was a lot of work and of course painful. But very quick.

-(with a face presentation) the pushing was very difficult. Her head was coming out wrong and I knew it (bc of no epidural). However, I believe that had she come out normally the pushing would have been the best part and a breeze. Because, even with a face presentation, once you get to where you know you need to push, the contractions are easier bc its your source of relief when you push with them. You are finally able to work with the uterus. For me, though, every time I was pushing her head was like "pushing a brick wall" that was my perineum. Not the case in a typical presentation.

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Overall I am so glad that I had the unmedicated birth. I really think it showed me some things about myself that I wasn't aware of. Things that translate into other areas of my life and that are worth evaluating. I need to qualify that with the fact that one is not right or wrong. But I think it's similar to the process of growing in maturity: if something could benefit you, whether or not you think that trait is necessary, it couldn't hurt to do it anyway. Let me explain.

A truly natural birth teaches patience and full surrender. You are not in charge. You are waiting on your body to tell you when it's time to deliver. Being three, or even five, centimeters dilated does not mean your body is ready. Going into labor means your body is ready. The patience it takes to do that is hard to attain to. It's hot. You're huge. Your body seems to be getting more and more tired everyday. Your have other little ones to chase and bottom line you may be just tired of being pregnant. All of those are normal feelings. I had them with all three of my pregnancies. However, to go natural means that you aren't surrendering to your feelings. You are waiting for God to grow that baby as He designed your body to do. Obviously if there is a medical issue that requires getting them early, He also designed that they could survive outside of the womb by a certain number of weeks gestation but there is a risk there you have to be willing to take. you have to admit that "convenience inductions" are astronomically high these days. Being induced because you are miserable is, I believe, keeping people from experiencing true surrender and walking in true patience. Now you may be someone who induced out of convenience and say with a hearty "Amen, and I'd do it again." And I am not saying you are wrong for doing it.. that's for you and your man to decide. However, I would say it's worth a look into how that would effect other areas in your life: physically, emotionally, spiritually as it relates to full surrender and walking in patience.

I had to ask myself during that weekend of trying all the wives tales to get the labor "going" trying to avoid pitocin that I knew was coming at 38 weeks if she didn't come out before, would I be willing to wait if induction wasn't in the picture? If I had normal blood sugar levels, no insulin and everything was like a typical, non-risk pregnancy, would I be patient enough to wait it out until 40-42 weeks until my body said it was time? That was a hard thing for me to process. If God designed my body in such a way that I would have that baby eventually (although it doesn't feel like it) why am I trying to be the orchestrator of timing. Anyway, Im sure you get my point.. enough of that one.

The other thing I learned (more, common sense) was that I can disagree with the good M.D. It's amazing to me, as I went through this process, how many woman do whatever they are told with no questions or dialogue with their doctors. If the the m.d says it.. it's good as gold. You have a right to your opinion and no one knows your body better than you do. And I am not talking about being disrespectful here. But rather being knowledgeable about what's going on with you and your body and knowing what would work best for you or saying that you are uncomfortable with something or would like to try something different. I know there are some that are non-confrontational and would never think to question what a doctor says, but there is dialogue that is not confrontation. Yes, doctors have way more training than we do, but still, they are not you. And you can disagree with them. Example: I self diagnosed my diabetes with the last two babies. When they "told" me I "needed" to come in (with Eva) for the blood glucose test I told them "no thank you." It wasn't my doctor who recommended it. And he was so surprised that I said I was going to pass and just monitor it with my glucometer at home. Now why was he so shocked? I believe it was because I wasn't doing it by the system or protocol. But my reasons were legit. If you know someone is borderline diabetic, how is pumping that much sugar into their system a good idea when a glucometer will tell you the same thing after eating a normal meal? Now my husband disagreed with me and said I needed to take the test. So I did. I got an astronomically high number and felt terrible for two days. He then apologized and his exact words were: "I should have listened to you. You know your body better than anyone and I don't want you to ever take that test again." The same rule applies to pediatricians too. End point.

Lastly, I learned that YOU CAN DO IT!!! You can do an unmedicated birth and an unmedicated natural birth. If you couldn't then God would have designed your body differently. Yes there is pain. That was given to us as part of the Fall of Adam but that doesn't mean that your can't actually deliver that way. You may doubt what you are capable of it, but believe me you can do it. HOWEVER, you have to be prepared. I don't know how many times I was told "oh so and so went without an epidural and hated it." And then I would ask, "were they planning on an unmedicated birth?" and every single time they were not. it was a case of not getting the epidural in time or it not working at all. Friends, that is not the same thing. I can't imagine how much more it would hurt to labor or birth unmedicated when you are not mentally prepared for it. So on that note, when you are prepared for it and have a method for dealing with the pain, then I guarantee it will not be something you hate. You very well could decide to just do the meds the next time, but I doubt you would hate it. I feel like I can say that since I had a delivery that lands most women on the cutting table. Its just not normal to deliver a baby face up, face first.

So for all of you out there that may be considering a natural/unmedicated birth let me tell you three things:

-lack of knowledge leads to fear. What you aren't well versed in will cause you to fear. Meaning, if you don't know what to do to get through the labor then you will fear the labor. And then think you can't do it. So learning and research are the key!

-Second, ONE CONTRACTION at a time. That's how you get through it. In the moment. You take one at a time. Regroup and do it again. before you know it.. it's time to push your baby out.

-I was most nervous about pushing the baby.. will i be able to handle the pain of her coming out, etc. And it was not near as bad as I thought..and thats with the face up, face first thing. ;-P

Well i think that's about it.. if I forgot something I'll let you know. So tell me what you think..

That's how I roll...

I said earlier that I would make a post about my entourage that was my lifeline during the delivery. I know that all those present may be tempted to think that they were there only because Im a social butterfly and want to open the door for a party in the delivery room, but the truth is that I could NOT have done it without everyone's help. Here are my heroes that made the day a success.

Obviously my amazing husband.  My coach!  I wanted him right there next to me the entire time.  He was so comforting and was my biggest fan.  In this photo he is supporting all of my weight as I started a painful contraction on the way to the potty. 

My nurses: Courtney and Nicole.  Courtney (on left) wants a natural childbirth and was so awesome and supportive from the first introduction!  They both did an amazing job!

Jennifer and Christina.  These girls were amazing.  I know they thought they would just sit back and watch but they got to do much more.  They were my support as I did squats and even helped massage my back and feet.  Thanks Chistina for bringing the massage oil!  Great idea. 

Oh my sister!  Mishka and her oldest, Livia.  It was Mishka's birthday and so she got her birthday wish.. for her and my daughter to have the same birthday.  And Livia loved watching all of it unfold... although she will now tell you that she is not going to have babies because it hurts too much.. lol. 

she must have been hiding because this is the only picture of Lori I have (that's not a candid shot).  Lori, Lori, Lori.. No way in the world to express how thankful I was to have her there.  I've already had that conversation with her so I won't go into it again or it would take three pages.  this woman has the experience (her own three birthing center births) and boy did she help us get through this birth with all her knowledge!  You Rock Girlfriend!

Pictures of friends in action:

and there is Ruth T. she did a great job even though I wasn't sure she would want to see me hurt like that.  

I can't thank you all enough.. from keeping the contraction log, to scratching, rubbing, encouraging, laughing, praying.. you guys did it all.  I am so thankful to have friends (& family) like you.  It makes me look on back on that day and truly treasure it all the more.  

Here's the story!

The "story." Let me just say: WOW! From the outset I need to say that NOTHING accomplished yesterday could have been done without the "hands on" support of my awesome husband, Lori B., Mishka, Jennifer, Christina, Ruth and even my six year old niece, Livia. All of them played a part in getting me through one of the biggest challenges I have ever had to face: the birth of Eva Isabel.

The Summary:
6:30 a.m- arrive at the hospital. Still 5-6 cm's dialated but with no contractions
7:30- Dr. R breaks my water. Hoping this will "throw" me into labor. Lori had me doing squats, knee raises as I walked from Point A to Point B (aka Mishka, Jen, Christina) and hanging out on the birthing ball. All in an attempt to get things going. But with no such luck.
11:00- They start the Pitocin drip. 2 units every 15 minutes, with the hope of staying put on a certain "level" once the contractions are consistently 2-3 minutes apart.  And that's what happens.  By the end of this hour they are coming consistently and are very painful, but with everyone's help I am getting through them one at a time. 

12:00-The nurse checks me because I have pressure and an "urge" to push.  However, I am told that I am still at 6 cm's.  But I have effaced to 90%.  I am highly discouraged but everyone convinces me that it's still progress and so we get back to work.

12:00-1:00- My contractions get unreal.  They are coming so hard and long that I am not having time to recover.  In this hour I move from 6 cm to 10 cm.  And it was very difficult.  Very painful.  With every contraction I am having the mental war of "what kind of idiot am I to think this was even a good idea?" and then as soon as the contraction was over, thinking, "alright Rachel you just got through another one.. you ARE doing it!."  By the end of this hour I was not hanging on very well emotionally and was getting irritated by not being able to be "comforted" during the contractions.  What worked one second was absolutely painful the next second.  But this was a good sign.. I was complete.  

1:00- I start hollering that I need to push.  They put me in the bed and check and sure enough I'm complete.  Time to push this girl out.  I start pushing at or around 1:10.  

1:30- Eva is born.  

Okay.. now what happened between 1:10 and 1:30 was THE MOST DIFFICULT THING I HAVE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE.  Why?  Well we knew my little angel was posterior (sunny side up).  That is why I had terrible back pain during my labor.  However what we did not know, until Eva started to "crown," was that Eva was coming down as a "face presentation."  Where most babies, even posterior ones, crown with the top of their head.. my little girl was crowning with her face.  Literally the first thing we saw was her nose and forehead.  If you just took a deep breath in then you understand what I am getting at.  Her head was arched back and was hitting the brick wall that was my perenium and was not able to lift up to get to the vaginal opening.  So I was obviously in a lot of pain as I kept trying to push her out but she wasn't going to come that way.  Then my doctor suggested a quick cut would have her out on the next push.  I obliged. And sure enough it worked and with two more pushes she was out.  Although I did this delivery unmedicated it was NOT quiet.  I was the proverbial woman yelling and screaming "get her OUT" and others in the building were thinking, "get that lady some help."  Even one of the nurses had to walk over to my bedside and say, "Rachel you are going to have to stop yelling.. you aren't breathing and pushing her out. You have to get back in control."  Eventually I did (how I have no clue) and pushed her out.  

Post delivery I found out that "face presentation" babies are very, very, very uncommon.  And normally when they do happen the labor ends in C-section.  Wow!  Unreal.  I still can not believe I delivered her with Pitocin and as the way she was coming out.  I have another post I want to do dedicated to all my helpers that were present during the labor but, first, here are some pictures to go with the summary I just gave you. 


Just getting started.  Water has not been broken yet.  Happy smiley faces.   Daddy in his pink shirt ready for his pink girl. 

Water has been broken.  Random contractions and not very painful.  Of course Im on the phone. 

Trying to do different things to hopefully turn that girl face down.  And wow does my bottom look HUGE!

One of the times that I was "hooked up" for baby monitoring.  Sweet husband massaging my feet and legs. 
this was during the 11:00-12:00 hour when the pain level was a 7-8 on scale.  I still had some relief between contractions.  

Dr. R talking to me about keeping the pitocin at the current level because he likes the pattern he sees with the frequency in contractions.  But it was during this conversation that I also started transition and the contractions were getting "worse" in pain level. 

Sooo.. then it became all hands on deck.. literally.  Massaging, rubbing, encouraging, praying.. this was the time when the pain level was 8-9 on a scale.  It was also apparent that the side lying position was not cutting it anymore. 

So we moved to the birthing ball while hanging over the bed.  Still needed all the support to get through EVERY SINGLE CONTRACTION!  Notice big Jorge providing counter pressure on my back because the pain there was unreal (because of Eva's posterior position).  However, I wasn't on that ball long when I started yelling "I need to push! I need to PUSH!"

Soo... in the bed I go. And it's time to push.  My face says it all.  it took me a few good contractions to be able to focus through the pain and feel how I was supposed to work with the contractions, breathe and push. 

Jorge reminding me that we are almost there.. just about to hold that sweet girl. 

Perfect picture to describe what I was feeling.  But with these last two pushes we got our baby girl!

Sweet Eva Isabel!

Worth every pain!

I am so glad to have experienced what I did. . but its another post entirely, for me to go into all the things I learned (pro's and con's) of a natural vs. medicated birth.  

Our little girl is doing great and we are expected to head home tomorrow sometime around noon.  Thanks for all your encouragement and I still have another post I want to do in honor of my awesome support team I had with me!  

Update #3

Went to the Doc this a.m.  Im between 5 and 6 cm's.  Still 70% effaced and she is still at a -3 station.  He did strip my membranes again.. Not counting on that working.  Great if it does, but not holding my breath.  

Either way we are to be at the hospital at 6:30 a.m tomorrow.  Dr. R is (after I asked) very willing to just break my water first when I get there (instead of immediately doing the pitocin) to see if that will kick start contractions.  We will wait that out for a "few hours" he said and if nothing happens then it's on to the pit drip.  But Im not worried about that because he is willing to give me a small dose and then turn it off once the contractions start.  

I'm in a better place emotionally today.  I have a lot more to say about what this experience is teaching me and showing me about myself and my expectations.. but that is another post. I really do appreciate all of you leaving me encouraging comments and being so supportive.  You gals are the best.  I know that by this time tomorrow I will be staring, wide eyed, into my daughters eyes and everything from this weekend will be a blur!

I'll keep you posted.. right now i have to get my boys to be quiet in their beds and go to sleep (nap time).   Namely, Alex who likes to stand on his head in his crib!

In keeping with full disclosure...

Since so many of you are interested in this process that is my "labor" I must post exactly how I feel at this moment.  I must stress that although this is my third birth, this is only my first time to labor on my own (without induction).   Well that is, until Tuesday.  My blood sugar numbers and insulin intake, just today, was proof as to why Eva will need to be taken early.  

Anyway.. I haven't so much as pooped once since drinking the castor oil.  But then at 3 pm today I had, for 5 hours, contractions that were exactly 8 minutes apart.  On the dot.  Well an occasional 4 minutes apart thrown in the mix.  It didn't matter whether I was sitting, standing, laying down, they persisted.  

Then as quickly as they appeared..they stopped.  Or went to 20 minutes apart at 8 p.m.  I am sure there are hundreds of women that groan on my behalf as they remember going through the same thing.  So I must say how discouraged I am and how frustrating this process is.  I don't think I mentally prepared enough for the emotional roller coaster natural labor is.  I do not wish to hear anymore... "she'll come when she is ready."  I know that.  I don't want to hear "your body IS working..its just warming up."  I don't know what I want to hear..wait yes I do.. I want to hear the words coming out of my own mouth : Honey my water just broke.  Or Honey..this one really really hurts.  I have never wanted pain so bad in my life.  

Full disclosure, right?  I am mad.  That's it.  At a time when I should be happy.  I am mad.  That's the ugly truth.  5 hours.  FIVE HOURS and then bam.. stop. You have to admit that is pretty frustrating.  

Either way she is coming out on Tuesday even if I have to reach in there and grab her myself. 

Update #2

Just downed some castor oil with Diet Coke.  We'll see if anything happens... well besides poop. 

We are pulling out all the stops today!  

FYI.. Im doing all these crazy wives tales in an attempt to beat an induction on Tuesday.  Even if I have to do an induction, though, Doc said he would be able to give me the smallest amount of pitocin and then when the contractions are consistent he will take me off the pit drip .  This is great news because the less pitocin I have the better my chance of not having an epidural!  

I'll keep you posted on how the castor oil works. 

Update...

I just lost my mucus plug.. 

had another one of those "really good contractions" when I laid down for my nap.. when I got up and went to the bathroom.. well.. you know.. it was grose and I had to try not to gag.. got a weak stomach with those things.  

i'll keep you posted if anything significant happens.